What is important to you in a partner?

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What has to be in place before you will consider taking any liaison further. What values does that person have to hold to match with you and give a harmonious start to building a relationship? For Tom, it was all about his son.

Tom's 13 year old son, Kev, was a football fanatic and very talented. He wanted to be a professional and Tom was determined to support him fully. Tom worked shifts - lots of evenings. At the weekend he went to the football matches with Kev and supported him. He told me that for a woman to become special in his life, she would have to want to spend time with Kev and Tom like this. Giving Kev the support he needed was a top priority with Tom. Whether you agree or not, Tom does NOT want a woman who expects to change this, this is an immutable in his books

When Nicola met her partner she said 'Look, I'm going to tell you straight - this is how I am. This is what's important to me and this is what's not flexible and this is where I am prepared to compromise and this is what I expect from a relationship - how about you?" Nicola wanted a man who knew who she was and who liked what that was and wanted to be around it. That's why she was so blunt.

While you may not be as blunt as Nicola, I am sure you can understand the value of finding out what is important to yourself and of conveying it to others and then finding out what is important to them. And here's a question to get you thinking...

What do you do or believe in that is so important to you that, if someone were to ask you to give it up or do a lot less of it to be with them, it would be unacceptable?

Flirting: NLP and Influence

Is NLP manipulative? When you think of a kitchen knife you probably think of it as a tool to chop vegetables or cut bread. Some nutters might use the kitchen knife to inflict bodily harm on others. Where is the harm? In the knife or in the person who uses it. Should we ban everyone from owning kitchen knives because they could be used as lethal weapons? I think NOT!

There are medically qualified people who use their knowledge to cure people. Dr Crippen used his medical knowledge to systematically poison people. Medicine is not evil in itself. It is not the tool, but the user of the tool that creates good or bad situations. NLP is like a knife, it is a tool that can be used for good or evil.

I choose to use my NLP skills for good. When I enter any situation I ask myself whether I want it to be a win-lose or win-win. I know which I prefer, how about you?

During the Flirting Weekend we will be using many processes and activities to empower you to flirt successfully. We will be employing the tools of NLP to create in ourselves the beliefs, states and abilities that will greatly enhance your ability to flirt successfully. As you go through the weekend you will begin to notice changes in yourself and be aware of your new abilities to make things happen as you want them to happen.

Of the many different activities we will be engaged in during this weekend, some will be based on NLP some derived from other fields of personal development. All are designed to help you design and use your own personal flirting style.

One thing you can be sure of is that you will learn what you want to learn and take away what you need to take away when you decide that you are going to play full out and be open and curious to whatever it is that you need. On the Flirting Weekend you will learn how to apply the tools of NLP for a specific purpose but what you learn will also serve you, not only as an aid to superb flirting, but in every area of your life.

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